An open letter to ‘MC’ and the CM

Letter 1

To MC (Mr. Chaudhary).

Dear Mr. Chaudhary (MC),

I understand you moved to DehraDun within the last decade from our neighbouring towns like Muzzafarnagar, Roorkee, Meerut, Saharanpur, Yamunanagar etc.; and found this town to be both peaceful and lucrative. I also understand that you had substantial agricultural income that you used; to buy land and commercial properties in DehraDun at prices that no local could afford. I am sure your 130 KG body and 6 feet; well built frame ,has also come in handy , while bidding for liquor licences, government contracts, and genrally to keep the typical 72 KG and 5 feet 7 inches ‘local’ away from where you think , he should keep away. The point is…today, you and your sons, nephews and cousins are all over our once quite town, driving bigger and meaner cars, getting into brawls with people on the road and generally making a “Muzzafarnagar” out of Doon. I also understand voilent and rude behaviour comes naturally to you. I understand.

I also understand that I can’t do too much about the ‘Muzzafarnagar- ization’ of my town because our country allows free movement and speech to all its citizens. Including you. I am sad, but I understand.

Wishing you away,

A pained citizen of DehraDun.

Letter 2

To the Chief Minister of Uttarakhand.

Dear CM Saab,

I understand that the next elections are only a year and a half (or so) away. I understand that you are both a concerned citizen and a local of our state. I also understand from your pictures on all the government hoardings across town that everything that happens in Uttarakhand; is done by you. Or it at least seems so.

Because ; finally the beuraucracy , the police , your own party people and a lot of other citizens look up to you for leadership and guidance, may I suggest a few items to be included in your to do list.

1. Empower the law and order machinery. The ‘sipahi’ on the road. Today the entire town is making a mockery of them, because everybody can get away with it. Because; you let it happen.
2. This state has more tourism potential than a lot of states combined. Tourists come and spend money, where thay find natural beauty preserved. Some of our tourist spots resemble garbage and concrete dumps. They are like that; because you let it happen.
3. Most young people still have to leave Doon for education and employment. This means they will spend their money and life away from this state. Which means that the benefit of their productivity will be lost to us. This happens because…

The point is, there’s still time. A year and a half (or so).

Wishing you’ll get the drift,

An aware and ‘voting’ citizen of the state.

Vineet Panchhi owns and runs Audio Wagon, his lifelong passion and now a music company. He blogs at Unplanned Journeys , and can be reached at: vineet.panchhi@audiowagon.com

Sundays Around Doon – Don’t Do This

You, me and Rohit, Sanjay, Neeta, Gayatri and everybody else is talking about it. Yes, we are all talking about one thing; the devastation that rains have caused all around us. There is not a single river or stream or even ‘nallah’ that hasn’t seen glorious days return, what with flooding to the extreme. Even the dry, forlorn Bindal and Rispana have returned to their ‘youth’, and in doing so have caused extensive damage to those who thought these rivers! were dead and went ahead building their houses on it.

And then, there is a not a single road that’s left untouched. Sounds sinister, but it’s just as if someone has mutilated my beautiful valley, and has left it with pock-marks and gashes all over. “Kisi ki nazar lag gayi hai meri ghati ko “ I sincerely tried, but my heart just could not bear the thought of roaming around and merry-making on Sunday, while my beautiful valley cries all around with wounds.

So here’s the deal. This week let’s not talk about getting away during the weekend. Let’s talk about what not to do on a weekend. Here are some starters that I thought of. Add to the list if you have more ideas. Here they are:

1. Many of us love to sip a late Sunday morning tea, and plan their outings. The planning continues over to the second cup of tea, and different opinions later, it’s already lunch time when they finally decide to go out. So, the morale of the story is – plan early, plan on a Friday evening or Saturday, and chalk out the nitty-gritty’s, to avoid confusion later on.

2. And then there are those of us who are into heavy partying. Partying of course, is incomplete unless it’s done on Saturdays. A vibrant, healthy Saturday party goes on till 2-3a.m. Yes, and you thought it ends at 11 p.m.? That my dear is when the last movie show ends. So after hitting the bed (or wherever) at 3 a.m. the spirits do not rise again till late next morning, and the Sunday trip has all but melted in air. So, if you have a plan to go out on Sunday, avoid the Saturday partying. Or (having trouble to decide) avoid the Sunday trip. Period.

3. A typical group among us is of those who love to go out. All is well until they would love to gather all their relatives and friends together. So Sunil and Nisha and their kids are invited. Masi ji and her family are also coming. Rishi and Kanika would join after they have left the kids at in-laws. Mohit has a morning appointment (can’t avoid it, yaar) so he will join by noon. And Ajay will pick up bua ji and her family in his big car. And they will all meet up at Astley Hall and go from there. The only people who end up enjoying are the kids who get treated to Burgers and Ice creams and Pizzas while Bua ji and gang is on the way, Rishi and Kanika are caught in the jam and Sunil and Nisha are just leaving the house! Keep the numbers small and you will enjoy longer.

4. And there are those who just don’t plan their Sundays. Do you know why? Because they don’t like to go out anywhere. They will be sighted outdoors, like that rare sighting of Neptune near the Pluto, that happens once in a millennia. I hope God will sincerely try to repair the genes of these people and let them know what all they are missing by not going out and having a blast. I mean, who doesn’t go out and enjoy? Are you one of those types?

5. And I’m not talking about those of us who are caught up in the game of – “Rohit wants to go see the Buddha temple”. “No, let’s go to Dakpathar, it’s so lovely”. “No, the roads are so bad, let’s catch up the afternoon show of ‘Dabang’, I can’t wait to see Munni”. “Offoh, tum bhi na, bas ham Mama ji ke ghar ja rahe hain. Pata hai, Tinky aayi hai Canada se, mere liye pata nahi kya kya laayi hai”.

Got more ideas? Do let me know.

Him Ahuja is an avid traveler and runs a travel blog named http://allhimalaya.com

LET'S GET 'SPORTY'!

It's time to reverse the trends and take matters into our own hands (as well as the remote controls!) It's time to put the children back in the playgrounds, hand them over to fun and adventure, and let us quit worrying and pressurizing too much! We've all suffered scraped knees, stubbed toes, and playgound rivalry in childhood, and none of us are the worse for it! If truth be told, we have learned invaluable life-lessons through these experiences, and we need to allow our children to learn from their own. Not letting them have these experiences through over-protecting and worry is just going to deprive them of necessary life-skills. What can we do to achieve this?

Neighbourhood parks can be made more sports-friendly by active follow-ups with government officials. Schools usually have space and sports facilities, so school authorities can be approached to let children use their facilities in the evenings. In societies, we can assign an area, chip in and buy a T.T. table, put up badminton nets, basketball hoops, etc. Skipping ropes, hoola hoops, roller-skates, skateboards, swing sets, etc. can be bought and children can have free access to them. Take the initiative and mobilize other children and their parents in these efforts. Talk to the local sports club about offering their facilites at a reduced rate for group registrations. It is not necessary that children only need vast open fields to play, even a backyard jungle gym, rock-climbing wall, or a cycling or running track around the block is enough for them to enjoy or exercise. Even a simple neighbourhood tree can be good to climb! These simple solutions need initial hard work, but the long-term benefits are many.

TV, computer, X-Box, Playstations, etc. HAVE to take a backseat! I will reiterate here that as parents, we should take back the control on these issues. It's not going to be an easy job, but can be done through discipline and sacrifice. Disciplining your children means setting rules in place, allotting time for homework, sports and other chores.TV viewing or computer games should be only for a limited amount of time, if necessary. Sacrifice means giving up these activities yourself so you can set good examples for your children, and be more involved parents!

How can we get children interested in sports? First, let them play just to have a good time. For them, it's not about winning or losing, it's just about 'fun'. Let the child choose his/her own sport/game. So if you've always dreamed of being a cricketer, and your son chooses basketball, just be happy for him and 'get over it'! Children who excel at sports are usually the ones who have a passion for it. Some children prefer solitary sports like tennis, swimming, martial arts, track and field, gymnastics, etc., while others prefer team sports like football, cricket, basketball, etc. If the children are training for any sport, find out if the coach not only knows the game well, but can treat the participants with positive encouragement, because the coach influences not only the child's game, but also his attitude.

As parents, we should also get the right 'sports attitude'. We need to question ourselves whether our children are playing sports to validate our self-worth and goals, do they have to become 'stars', or do we just want them to enjoy themselves and achieve their own potential? We also have to take the pressure off, give them a healthy view of competition and success. Competitive frenzy affects parents more than children! Dilip Vengsarkar once said, “I did not have to prove myself. That is exactly why I proved myself”. Have realistic expectations according to your child's capabilities and not according to what others are doing. Not every child can be a prodigy. In fact, only 3% of children who play competitive sports will ever reach elite levels, but 100% of them can be allowed to enjoy sports! If the child wants to make sports his sole focus, even if he is not a star performer, just 'let be', as he is playing for his dreams, not yours.

While they play, always applaud their efforts. I don't mean false praise, but focus on something they do well, like a good shot or catch. Also appreciate the efforts of the other children playing with or against your child. This encourages them to appreciate the ability in others, and learn to lose gracefully. Help them to handle defeat and disappointment by instilling in them that winning or losing is not as important as always giving your best. Teach them to make personal goals rather than competitive ones. Also get 'sporty' with your kids. Fly a kite together, learn how to skate, go rock-climbing or trekking with them, teach them the moves of your favourite sport(s), make a treasure-map and go on a 'treasure hunt'! Children love it when their Mom and Dad play with them, we can be their 'cool' parents, and playing sports with our children is guaranteed to take the 'years' off!

Juhi Mehta, the quintessential mother-teacher, runs Life Express - an after-school center for children. She can be reached at juhimalini@gmail.com. She also writes 'Reflections of an inner Journey'

I swear, I ‘swear’! @#$%&%$#@!!!

DehraDun in the 70s (as I remember) in terms of its demographics; was divided into:

(1) Old Money, Rajpur Road/Dalanwala , Premier Padmini, English Accent, Bania/Punjabi/Anglo/Garhwali, Children at Doon/Welham, cousins at London.
(2) New Money, Race Course, Second Hand Premier Padmini, Punjabi Accent, Sikh/Punjabi/Bania, Children at ‘wherever we could pay and get in’, cousins in Canada.
(3) No Money, Pultan Bazaar/Moti Bazaar/Machi Bazaar, Third Hand ‘Vijay Super’ Scooter, mixed and unidentifiable accents , children at Mission School/Gandhi School/Sadhu Ram School (or any school with fees less than 7 Rs. a month), cousins at Patel Nagar /Prem Nagar/ Surnimal Bazaar.

Get the drift?

I proudly belonged to category 3 above.

Our family (I hear) was well to do before partition, somewhere in North West Frontier Province. That’s what we were told…but who knows? For all I know; my ancestors may be making up stories about their wealth back in “Mianwali” (now in Pakistan). I for one, never really saw any sign of either wealth, or people who were once wealthy.This could be judged by the frequency and choice of swear words used by the categories described above.

Category 1, frowned at the use of any form of abusive language and believed that all men are gents , and all women ladies… Ya, Ya!
Category 2, permitted only a few words, and that too; when one is at least a kilometer away from the ‘Gurudwara’ or out of audible ranges of the pictures of the Sikh gurus that adorned all shops and houses.

Category 3 (My set), was the most creative. I mean in the ‘swearing’ section. By the time a kid was 6, all the basic swear words, including names of choicest animals became part of a kid’s vocabulary. The preferred languages being Hindi and Punjabi. Kids of 13-14 were considered mature in the ‘swearing’ section and were expected to come up with their own creative phrases. The use and abuse of close relatives, body parts and references to lower castes were mandatory to be considered part of the ‘pack’. What fun! And what a shame…banned for a few
unfortunate ones like us.

You see, we went to the wrenched “English” schools on Rajpur Road, and had to pretend to be part of category 1 above. That was the way ‘good boys and girls’ behaved. How I missed being able to call the ‘bully of the mohalla’ anything other than by his first name. 12 years of missionary education, followed by 3 years of hospitality training, followed by 16 years of MNCs made me a completely useless man. Born a category 3, behaving like a category 1…how ridiculous.

This till I had a revelation some months ago. I swore loudly at a biker , who had cut me off. I swore in Hindi followed by Punjabi and English. The biker didn’t hear any of it …but I did. Heard it and felt it… The sudden rush of energy in the body. The ability to blow your fuse when you want and not bottle up. The ability to be creative about chopping somebody to the ground in your mind. What a wonderful art , and how ignorant have I been.

“No more” I said! No more pretence! I was born a category 3…My dad is a category 3, so are all my cousins, irrespective of their current financial positions…and belive me…we are a proud bunch.

And since that fateful day, I realized how a category 3 blood needs category 3 attitudes. No more the Category 1 gentleman, who would stare at you if you cut him off on the road. Oh come on, No Sir…try anything with me now and you will know I can swear …and I ‘swear’ too that. @#$%&!@#$.

Vineet Panchhi owns and runs Audio Wagon, his lifelong passion and now a music company. He blogs at Unplanned Journeys , and can be reached at: vineet.panchhi@audiowagon.com

NO MORE FOR THE LOVE OF IT!

Are those days past when sports and games were just played for the fun, adventure and excitement, when there were no strings (career, fame and money) attached? When all that mattered was being one with the sport at that moment, the rush of energy and adrenaline, the simple pleasures in jumping a little higher, or stretching a little longer and hitting a little stronger and better, the hours of being with friends, sometimes strangers, learning to cope with the dynamics and politics, the sense of purpose mixed with the joy of achievement. When the hours spent on the field did not have to justified with better performance, trophies or certificates. When losing and winning were secondary to the pure fun and thrill of the game itself. Were we not just a bunch of kids doing what we loved to do.....play? Do our children play spend even a tenth of the time we spent playing games and sports, and even if they do, do they now play them for the same reasons?

There is a steady decline in active play. There is less free time, increased academic pressure, and the TVs, computers and playstations have become the primary source of entertainment! They have moved a whole generation from outdoors to indoors (and I don't only mean the children!), cutting them off from any physical activities. Big companies have to sell products, and most of this generation feels obliged to watch their advertisements and help them achieve their sales targets! Lack of space has also become a huge problem, and children mostly remain cooped up in isolated houses or cramped colonies and flats, with little or no space to play. Housing societies do not prioritize children's playgrounds, instead they believe in gymnasiums and clubhouses for adults! Small neighbourhood parks, with walking or cycling tracks have been 'eaten up' by big malls and commercial complexes. Even if there is a small park nearby, safety concerns make them unusable, as they are not provided with security, and parents do not allow their children to play outdoors unsupervised.

Schools in India also do not emphasize on sports these days (it was not so in our school and college-days). The focus is now completely on academic performance, school exams and preparation for competitive exams. Academic excellence has become the only parameter of achievement or success, other activities like sports, music, art, etc. have all been sidelined for study-related activities. Students are allotted a measly half an hour to an hour of PE time per week, and that too is never utilized for sports properly. Some schools have huge playgrounds which are not put to much use at all, while others have no playgrounds at all. Either way, the message is clear, excelling in academics is all that is required of a 'good student'. Overall development is no more a criterion. We are a 'cerebral' nation now, and even the policy-making and bureaucratic system has ignored sports to a great extent.

Another reason, I feel, is that sports have become too 'organized'. The element of 'free play' or unstructured sports is fast being replaced by ideas of trying to 'manage' sports, laying stress on perfection and competition. From time immemorial, children have enjoyed sports as a spontaneous activity, minus adult involvement. Too much structure is now leading to quick burn-out and boredom. Burn-out is the quitting/dropping of any activity that was at one time enjoyable. With excessive structure, and year-round tournaments and matches, sports fatigue sets in. Constant criticism from coaches, parents and teammates leads to anxiety and stress, and consequently burnout. The demands of parents from their children sometimes exceeds their physical and cognitive devlopment, leading to feelings of inadequacy, frustration and depression. Aggression, anti-social behaviour and even suicidal tendencies become evident in children. Children begin playing for their parents, and the fun and spirit of adventure goes missing. The stakes become too high and the business models are hard for kids to understand. Boredom and rejection comes fast. There are organized sports programmes even for 3 and 4-year olds! More than two-thirds of children quit organized sports by thirteen, which is actually the age they can do something worthwhile.

All parents want 'gifted' children, just being good at something is not enough! There is a set of parents who stress too much on academics, proficiency in maths, science and language skills becomes paramount, while there is the other set of well-meaning parents who push their children into sports to excel. The expectations from them are phenomenal, as these parents are using sports the same way the other set of parents use academics – as springboards for careers and financial security. Some parents actually push their children too much, wanting to live their own dreams vicariously through them, to experience success through their children. Others use it to validate their own worth as parents, to prove to the world how much they sacrifice or forsake for the sake of their children's sports schedules or future careers! Either way, this trend is very harmful for the children. It robs them of their childhood, simple enjoyment, social development, and true sense of sportsmanship. A sad state of affairs indeed! If what you've just read has made you think, let's look for solutions next time. Till then!

Juhi Mehta, the quintessential mother-teacher, runs Life Express - an after-school center for children. She can be reached at juhimalini@gmail.com. She also writes 'Reflections of an inner Journey'

Sundays Around Doon - Conspiracy

It sounds like there is a big conspiracy going on to keep the Doonites away from their weekend outings. You see, I can’t find any other explanation for the incessant torrential rains that have been mysteriously hounding us for two months now. This hasn’t happened to ‘us’ in the last 15 years atleast. And I’m certain we haven’t done anything to invoke the ‘fury’; I mean, we are all innocent of the trees that have been cut in the valley for the last 15 years, and the big mansions we have made reducing the ground water table, and the way we have inhabited the river-sides, and river beds. After all, it’s our valley and would we do this to ‘our’ valley? Never!

I am definite that there is a ‘deep conspiracy’ behind all this hatched by ‘vested interests’ and ‘big powers to-be’ who obviously are jealous of our so popular and pleasurable weekend trips. If we inquire deep, we might find that it could be the work of the road-side sellers whose Sunday earnings have been going down with half the Dehradun disappearing on Sundays. On the other hand, weekend earnings of Petrol Pump Owners have been shooting up. This conflict of interests seems very ominous.

But we can’t let these ‘conspiracies’ ruin our weekends, can we? The ‘never-say-die’ spirits of the Doonites have to be recalled at these times, and weekend pleasures have to be maintained at all costs. So what, if we are unable to go on long weekend rides and trips. Let’s not forget that the ultimate pleasure of a rainy day is in sipping hot ‘tulsi’ tea with ‘garam pakoras’ and admiring the Mussoorie from our verandahs. After all, that’s why we made such big decorative verandahs, didn’t we?

Talking of pakoras, on such occasions and rainy seasons, Doonites have always been visiting the famous ‘Sardar ji ke pakore’ at Rajpur for generations. They used to trudge on bicycles, scoot on Lamberattas, and zoom on their Fiats with window curtains. Nowadays, we just key start our bikes and gearless Honda Citys and still go there to enjoy the ‘Sardar ji ke pakore’.

Those who don’t like ‘pakoras’ and those who have substituted their pleasure of ‘pakoras’ with ‘momos’ head over religiously to different “food shrines” – to ‘auntyji ke momo’ near Clock Tower, to ‘momo factory’ in Garhi cantt, and to Clement Town for the authentic taste.

And those who are too lazy to drive ‘that’ long or need more appetizing delights head over to ‘Chetan ki poori’ at Hanuman Chowk, or to the famous ‘Sonu ke katlame- chhole’ at Moti Bazar. But these are all morning pleasures. Let’s not forget those who come evening, rush to ‘Tara machhi wala’ at Clock Tower and ‘Maheshi ke kababs’ at Dilaram and ‘Bhatia ji ka mutton’ at Premnagar. And remember, this is just the snacks we are talking about. And then they think they can ruin our pleasures, eh!

Down with the conspiracies! Up with the ‘momos’, ‘pakoras’ or …whatever! haha!

Him Ahuja is an avid traveler and runs a travel blog named http://allhimalaya.com

THE IMPORTANCE OF SPORTS

There was complete silence on the playground. It was the nail-biting finale of the 'Kabaddi' match and I was a part of the team of one of the Houses. The entire student body was supporting either of the two House teams. All around me I could see a sea of faces, anxious, excited, there was whispering, amidst a lot of nervous tension in the air. We players were full of confidence and bravado on the outside, while each one of us was a bundle of nerves inside! It was a tough match which needed a lot of grit, stamina and determination from us. We had to focus on not losing our nerve, play as a team, with great coordination and focus. What began in pin-drop silence ended in a deafening roar! There were tears and laughter all around, as our team won! There were either tears of frustration or joy, but one thing stood out quite clearly, even the losing team were satisfied at a match well-played! That's what comes out of the ultimate moments in all sports. In that moment, winning or losing takes a backseat, only the satisfaction of playing the game remains!

Despite being a very skinny and not-so-tough kid, I participated in as many sports and games that I could possibly manage or could actually play! I had to prove to myself and my teasing classmates and friends, that my weak exterior had a tough interior! And in that process, I learned some of the most invaluable lessons in life – I now see that those endless hours on the field, that never-say-die philosophy has stood me in good stead when real life came along with real problems! It enhanced my decision-making, concentration, ability to focus completely on the task at hand, taking criticism and rejection well, holding my own when surrounded by the 'bigger and better'! Even physically, I became tougher and stronger with athletics, learned quick reflexes and dexterity through badminton and table-tennis, learned to stretch myself beyond my pre-conceived limits in gymnastics, broke the gender biases in football, and so on! I will never forget the day when I decided to run the marathon which took us around our town, and eventually when I reached the school grounds, I saw that everyone else had finished a long time ago and I was the last, but I did not give up, and to the cheers of the entire school egging me on, I finished the final round! I stood last, but I was as proud as I would have been to win that race, because I had run the race knowing full well that it was beyond my physical capacity, but nonetheless I wanted to attempt to make it possible and win a few points for my House as well!

I am revealing so much (even the embarassing stuff!) about myself, to make the point that playing sports can be a total character-building experience. All that we learn within the boundaries of the classroom, can be put into practice on the playfield, and studies and sports together can really create a well-rounded (pun intended!) individual. Sports participation can bring about an appreciation of health and fitness, develop positive self-image, teach us to be team-players, develop social skills like taking turns and sharing, teach how to manage both success and disappointment, teach how to respect others' capabilities and talents, and all this while having fun! I have witnessed that sports builds character, teaches honesty, integrity and fair-play, discipline and sacrifice, hard work and perseverance, problem solving and communication skills, commitment and dedication towards a cause, all in all, a defence academy training and a MBA degree, rolled into one! And what experts have noted is that all these skills are also transferable beyond the sporting context, and can be put to good use in all kinds of domestic, corporate, workplace situations, and at any level of responsibility.

The reason for this article is my growing worry about the sports situation these days. If you would take a reality check right now, and think about how long your child/children spend playing sports (structured or unstructured) every day? Is it two hours or more, one hour or less, less than half an hour, an hour or two on weekends, or no sports activity whatsoever? Your answer will bring to light the condition of most kids today! If your answer is 'yes' to the first one, you are definitely one of the rare parent-child teams!

It is a fact that most children take to sports and games like a duck to water, so why is there such a great lacuna, a whole generation being kept away, being deprived of the benefits and value of sports? For centuries, sports have been used for enjoyment, physical activity and fitness. Why then this sudden decline of interest? The causes are numerous, but we will only go into that next week. I am convinced the answers lie with us. Meanwhile, do send me your own sports stories and experiences, and those of your children as well. Till then!

Juhi Mehta, the quintessential mother-teacher, runs Life Express - an after-school center for children. She can be reached at juhimalini@gmail.com. She also writes 'Reflections of an inner Journey'

THIN IS 'IN'!

Long back, I happened to watch a Hollywood movie on college life. It showed some girls, very popular - the 'in' set, who everyone wanted to be like. It was a classic movie about peer pressure and acceptance, based on how your worth was measured by your good looks. A lot of movies are based on these issues but somehow the message gets lost in the visual extravaganza of beautiful bodies and faces, the revelry of teen life, and the burning need of the teenagers watching these movies to be like one of those on celluloid, despite the 'bad' consequences these characters end up facing! One thing that really stayed with me was that the most popular girl was secretly 'bulimic'. That was the first I ever heard of this condition. I also remember watching something else on 'anorexia'. These issues really haunted me for a long time and I wanted to know more on the subject. Soon I understood that these were serious mental diseases and a bane of our modern society.

'Bulimia Nervosa' and 'Anorexia Nervosa', as the names suggest, are disorders of the brain and nervous system. According to medical research, dieting, over-exercising and binge-eating satisfy all the clinical and biological criteria for addictions like smoking, drinking or drug abuse! In Anorexia, the person displays a tendency to starve oneself and has a decreasing interest in food, while in Bulimia, the person has increasing difficulty in resisting food and becomes a compulsive eater, who binges on food, and then uses laxatives, diuretics, enemas, self-induced vomitting, or excessive exercises to stay slim. Anorexia, apparently, has the most severe consequence with a mortality rate higher than that of almost all other mental disorders! It usually begins with a perfectly normal weight-reducing diet, the person loses weight, eats less and less until she is almost skin and bones. It affects young people of both sexes, although ninety percent are females from well-off homes.

Think about a Barbie doll. What is the mental image you get? The first thing you think of is an almost non-existent waist and bottom, and a thin and curvaceous figure! And this is what our children, especially girls, grow up with. Then all they watch on TV and celluloid are extremely thin people with beautiful faces. They are not obviously aware of all the contributions of the medical scalpel behind these beautiful bodies and faces! And even if they are, they get the message that anything is justified to get that kind of body or face, even surgery, excessive dieting or exercise. Everywhere they look around them, they are faced with unrealistic expectations of beauty or handsomeness, so it's inevitable that most of them find themselves falling short! God has not created everyone to look the same, but everyone wants to fit into a certain image of beauty. Apparels, cosmetics, automobiles, food, beverages, appliances, you name it, and you will find beautiful bodies selling these things! The impact of these visuals, day and night on the minds of children, even adults, is mind-boggling! If that is not enough, there is more available in the gossip magazines, cinema and sports celebrities to emulate. They spend hours every day in front of the mirror, preening themselves, checking their clothes, hairstyles, bodily attributes, their complexion, everything is under a microscope! And I've personally experienced the trend that most parents tend to pass it off as a 'passing phase'. But the reality is that many adolescents fall prey to this, and the worst is, the parents are the last to know about it. In my own experience, I have seen many a young child refuse even a normal amount of food, for fear of “putting on weight”! Parents have no time these days to watch out for these harmful tendencies in their children, as they are too busy. Staying fit and eating healthy should never be equated to over-exercising or eating less.

All this is leading to a huge identity crisis. Children suffer from low self-image. Children in the West spend a lot of time and money on skin darkening, whereas their 'darker' counterparts in Eastern countries spend the same on getting a 'fair' complexion! Boys want to look taller and muscular, girls want to look thin and petite. This altering and adjusting of their bodies is done to gain recognition and acceptance from the opposite sex, their peer group, as also to measure up to the body images promoted by today's media. Behavioural scientists consider these diseases to be family ones rather than individual ones. That is why it has been noticed that family therapy has proven to be the best cure for anorexics. They are able to develop a healthier identity and gain more individuality.

In today's context, there is only so much we can do to control what our children watch, who they meet, what they look up to, etc. The only thing we can give them is the right kind of guidance, help them to be level-headed and balanced enough to withstand peer pressure, and we can stay involved enough in their lives for them to be aware of our attention and unconditional love. There is no substitute for any of these.

Juhi Mehta, the quintessential mother-teacher, runs Life Express - an after-school center for children. She can be reached at juhimalini@gmail.com. She also writes 'Reflections of an inner Journey'

The 5 Tibetans

The Five Tibetans, is a series of postures, asanas if you please, much like the Surya Namaskar that when performed in the set sequence, lead to immense benefits - some have called it the ‘fountain of youth’, others tell of old men who inexplicably became healthy, strong, and full of "vigor and virility" after entering a particular lamasery where this system was followed.
Reported to be more than 2500 years old, this system was apparently introduced to the world at large by Peter Kelder in 1939, who himself learnt of it from a retired British Army colonel.
The first of the five Tibetans, is based on the principle of the cork screw. Raise your arms to your side, at shoulder level, arms parallel to the ground. The left palm faces upwards towards the ceiling, the right one faces down towards the ground. Now, slowly, very slowly, with your eyes closed, rotate in the direction of your right hand. If you were to look at this posture from the ceiling, it would resemble the functioning of a cork screw, with the practitioner drawing in the cosmic energy. 7 cycles should be enough to begin with. Gradually, over a period of say a few months, increase to 21.

For the second rite, kneel down, facing east, with your hands on your bum. Start with you chin touching your chest, as low down as possible, and while breathing in raise your chin so it point to the ceiling, and keep going back till you can take you body weight is on your hands. 7 cycles again to begin with, going up to 21 with time.

The third one is quite similar to the boat pose or the nauka asan. Lie down, head pointing east, with arms on your side. Now using your stomach muscles, raise your upper body and the feet up to the same level, a bit like the letter ‘V’. Stay for a few seconds in this position, then slowly go down to lying down position. 7 cycles or as many as you can manage.

For the fourth rite, sit on your bum, soles of the feet flat on the ground, hands on the floor behind you. From here, as you breathe in raise your body up so it is parallel to the ground, head thrown back all way so you can look at the wall behind you. This posture should resemble a table, with your stomach forming the table top. Come down slowly as you breathe out. 7 cycles or as many as you can manage.

The fifth one starts with the mountain pose. All your weight on your hands and feet, head down, as close as possible to the knees. Move smoothly from this up-dog to the cobra pose or the bhujang asan - hips close to the ground, chin pointing towards the ceiling. The caveat is to not let your body touch the ground, so all your weight is on your hands and toes. Breathe in while going into cobra pose and breathe out while going into mountain pose.

According to Kelder, the colonel’s stay in the lamasery transformed him from a stooped, old gentleman with a cane to a tall and straight young man in the prime of his life. Discounting for exaggerations, I think we can atleast expect from a regular practice is increased energy, stress reduction, and an enhanced sense of calm, clarity of thought, increased strength and flexibility, and an overall improvement in health and well-being.

Ajay Mehta is a print designer, an Advanced Pranic Healer and a ‘spiritual’ seeker. He can be reached at ajaxmehta@gmail.com

Vote for Tinku

Tyagi Saab lives on EC Road. He’s lived there for 40 years and has developed a deep and lasting friendship with his house painter that goes beyond mere transactional relationships. He has a very good reason to do so.

Every year after the monsoons his boundary wall needs a rub-off, scaling and a fresh coat. Not because last year’s paint is worn off, but because he can hardly see the paint anymore. His entire wall; post the monsoons is covered with posters. Posters that say ‘Vote for Tinku for President’. ‘Tinku’ in the last sentence is just a fictional place holder and can be easily replaced by Dabbu, Shabbu, Nikku, Pappu, Pinto, Munna, Kaku, and Rocky. All probable candidates for the coveted college election posts and aspiring future politicians.

Just for kicks, I decided to monitor one of the rallies that started around Rajpur Road and ended at the college. The objective… to observe and examine how hundreds of young people, with one objective and goal are brought together. Maybe this way, we may find some answers to our country’s leadership needs.

At the Nanny’s Bakery cross-roads, a few from the pack broke off to get their nicotine. I walked up to them, hoping to strike a conversation, which happened effortlessly. I came straight to the point. “So why do you support Tinku? What are his plans if he wins? Has he shared his vision; about the efforts he will make, to improve the college and its functioning on being elected?” I stated the rapid fire. “Sure” the largest built of the pack answered. “He is very smart. He is also our friend. We trust him. He is the best of the candidates. Vote for Tinku. Vote for Tinku”

“I trust your judgment.” I interjected. “But I guess I should have explained the question better…what I meant was, do you really know what you want for the college and hence have decided to support the one that aligns with your vision?” I continued, hoping to have driven the point home and looking intently in their direction for a ray of light.

This time the pan-masala chewing, smaller built but sharp eyed boy replied in a tone that clearly indicated his intellectual superiority…“ You see…This is not that simple. It takes an acute understanding of human nature to select a candidate. We are supporting him because he understands us. He is very smart. He is also our friend. We trust him. He is the best of the candidates. Vote for Tinku. Vote for Tinku.”

I didn’t even attempt to extend the conversation further and walked towards Tyagi Saab’s house hoping for a cup of ‘tea without sugar’.

Tyagi Saab heard my episode without any reaction whilst stirring the tea. When I insisted that he shares his older and mature opinion about the episode all he said was “Vineet, isn’t this exactly how we choose leaders? Do you know why you vote for one party and not the other? Do you know enough about the candidate before the elections? We vote for friends. We trust them. We believe they are the best. So shut up and have your tea. I have better things to worry about… like taking posters off my walls.”

The tea was really nice. I wouldn’t be vising Tyagi Saab for some time now. Vote for Tinku.

Vineet Panchhi owns and runs Audio Wagon, his lifelong passion and now a music company. He blogs at Unplanned Journeys , and can be reached at: vineet.panchhi@audiowagon.com